A well-known writing maxim, although not entirely true-and yet completely true.
Here's the paradox: George Lucas had never been in space, and J. R. R. Tolkien had certainly never been to Middle Earth. But Lucas did know MOVIES and MYTHOLOGY, and Star Wars is one magnificent fusion of movie iconography and classic hero mythos. Tolkein was a linguist, and the whole history of Middle Earth began as an experiment in the evolution of language. So even though these men did write something completely foreign to their personal experience, they still KNEW it. The essence of the maxim is the corollary: don't write what you don't know.
Let us consider the shipper who, on viewing a JL cartoon with a flashback to Crime Alley, remarked that it was "interesting" to… wait for it… learn something about Bruce's early life. Show of hands, who thinks that someone purporting to be a Batman devotee should probably know something about the character beyond the shape of his eye slits? Perhaps, oh, I don't know, the defining moment of his existence? That might be a good place to start. Who's with me?
There's more, btw. (God knows, all fandoms must have their crosses to bear, but Batman is the one I get all the emails about.) Let us explore the stupifying layers of wrong in a story where: rather than go out and protect his city, Bruce is at home watching television and sees Fellowship of the RIng. He remembers his mother reading him this beautiful love story about the immortal princess and the human warrior. Martha skipped the scary parts that wouldn't interest a young boy, you know the stuff about the Hobbits and the wizards and the Dark Lord… ah… the rings of power, the Dwarves, the Ents, Golum-well, you get the idea. It's about Viggo and the elf chick from the appendix-who looks exactly like Bruce always pictured her, and isn't it funny that he never noticed until now, she looks just like Diana.
Okay, I used the most extreme example I could find to make the point, but the difference between that 4-star fustercluck and the billionaire CEO flying on Jetblue or gang members from the Crips, Bloods and Los Traviesos all talking like Chuck Dixon "mooks" is just a matter of degree.
So, next few days, we'll talk research. Don't panic, nobody has to get a double masters in criminology and sociology with a Ph.D. in quantum mechanics, a black belt in karate, and a gold metal in gymnastics. We're just learning enough not to embarrass ourselves, and if we do it right, we can usually have some fun.
There are 3 areas where fic writers who have no idea what they're doing make my teeth hurt.
1. New York City
2. Upper class lifestyle
3. Men
There's no quick fix for #3. Little girls spinning wish dreams based on the "expression" in the white triangles of Batman's eye slits will eventually grow up and come into contact with ego-formed adults. They will quickly discover those fundamental characteristics of the male animal: the spine, the penis, and, oh yes, what's that other thing called… self-respect. Until then, I don't think there's any hope for them. In a recent correspondence with a fellow writer, I remarked that, of all the characters where you just can't get away with "Harlequin Romance guy" behavior and still be remotely credible, Bruce Wayne/Batman is very near the top of the list.
Anyway, paraphrasing our favorite caption contest advertising campaign: there are some things nothing but experience can buy, for everything else, there's research.
Next time, we'll begin with the city so nice, they named it twice.
